Modern Rashi on: “UnShadchans” Group Plans Event
A shadchan by any other name…
Well, COL dropped another masterpiece of communal self-delusion, and unfortunately for all of us, it involves shadchanim this time around. Now, everyone hates shadchanim because they absolutely suck. So rather than trying to unsuck, they just unbranded to unshadchanim. For anyone who actually wasted their time reading this article, you’d quickly realize that the only way in which they differentiate themselves from shadchanim is they make events where anyone can come and give them more names to gossip about. This seems very shadchaney to me. And now, time for the Modern Rashi smackdown:
They opened a “Shiduch Office” to offer better, easier and more effective ways of networking and sharing around information and profiles of eligible Chabad singles to date and marry.
Now let’s evaluate this statement for a moment: “to offer better, easier and more effective ways of networking and sharing around information.” Whenever a shadchan uses words like networking, sharing around, or information, that’s code for “make generally incorrect assumptions about people we don’t know and gossip about it.”
“There’s a certain stigma involved with being a “shadchan.” Even many shadchanim don’t like the term,” explains Milecki. “So we have coined a new one: The UnShadchan. That means everyone can help make a shiduch.”
What they did here, is they call themselves a new name all while doing the same exact thing. The only difference is now that they are “unshadchanim”, everyone is allowed in their loshan hara orgy.
“Using the traditional “shadchan” approach, but with a revolutionary twist, we can make many more shiduchim,” she says. “Because everyone knows someone looking for a shiduch.”
The revolutionary twist is apparently that they have now created a MLM group for gossip.
To be invited as an UnShadchan, you will have to submit a minimum of 2 profiles of single men and one or more of single women that you will present at the event. These singles can be children, siblings, Shabbos guests, friends, children of friends or co-workers.
Translation: the only difference between a shadchan and an unshadchan is that a shadchan already has names to gossip about, while an unshadchan makes you bring your own. It is literally a BYON event, bring your own names. And of course, they frame it like some holy avodah. Meanwhile, the actual activity is figuring out who once stood near who on a Crown Heights rooftop on some sukkos when Obama was still president.
These women are not escaping stigma, they are not reinventing anything, they are not revolutionizing shidduchim. They are running the same gossip operation with a new label slapped on the box. Really, get over yourselves. Honestly, the only people stupid enough to fall for this rebrand are those sad souls who already worship shadchanim, bless your hearts.